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See the original image at speterdavis.com —

Iron Man: A Brutally Honest Version of the Movie... [COMIC]

speterdavis.com — I am Iron Man. SURPRISE!!! FUTURISTIC BATTLE SUIT DESTROY!!!

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  • quomen, on 07/25/2008, -7/+188This is actually pretty funny. However, the description is terrible.
  • case116, on 07/25/2008, -5/+14Excellent!
  • NitrousFlare, on 07/25/2008, -9/+246Dayam.
    • yohnstoppable, on 07/25/2008, -4/+15That is whack
      • diggduggDOOM, on 07/25/2008, -4/+1Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, yohnstoppable?
      • Inohavehalos, on 07/25/2008, -4/+1Okay "*****" is supposed to go before "That is whack."

        You messed it up.
    • FuckThaMeme, on 07/25/2008, -10/+2Was he actually in the movie? I don't remember him at all.

      I suppose that's what you get with a cam...
      • solidus636, on 07/25/2008, -1/+1Hand in your geek license for not going to watch the movie. It was totally worth it.
      • FuckThaMeme, on 07/26/2008, -0/+1It wasn't
    • Pzycho, on 07/25/2008, -1/+19Aw hell naw.
      • Jarasmen, on 07/25/2008, -0/+5I'm sorry you don't like it, Will Smith.
    • AutoTom, on 07/25/2008, -2/+2{insert quote from submitted story because i am not clever enough to come up with a real joke/decent comment myself}
      • SublimeRuin, on 07/26/2008, -0/+2 {Make fun of other users witty comment because I long for internet acceptance and can not think of my own witty response} Note: I will show all my friends this comment in hopes that they find me more interesting because of it.
    • opiniastrous, on 07/26/2008, -0/+2Are you black? I get the feeling you're black, I don't know why...
  • Innisskillin, on 07/25/2008, -5/+38No spoiler warning?

    Just kidding... who hasn't seen Ironman yet?
    • michaelphw, on 07/25/2008, -16/+6Me. But I don't mind. I've seen Batman :)
    • dorkino, on 07/25/2008, -21/+9Me, and I don't plan on it.
    • Ranvier, on 07/25/2008, -14/+10Me.
    • sgtawol, on 07/25/2008, -4/+29Me. Theatres are RIP-OFFFFFFFs. I'll wait for a rental or netflix.
      • diulei, on 07/25/2008, -0/+4Agreed...but I hope you have a big plasma and some nice speakers. Adds the the experience.
    • VigRoco, on 07/25/2008, -5/+10Me. I will have to catch it in our local movie graveyard.
    • SevanElevan, on 07/25/2008, -0/+39Me. I'm blind.
    • skyroket, on 07/26/2008, -3/+1I'm waiting for aXXo. I live in the middle of nowhere. Good summary, though! I want to see Gweneth Paltrow randomly hack into things and make them blow up, now. I didn't even realize she was in the movie.
  • BorsKaegel, on 07/25/2008, -10/+78" That's basically the equivalent of asking a raccoon with stone-age tools to build the Hubble Space Telescope. But ok. "

    Classic.
  • HiVoltRock, on 07/25/2008, -7/+32SURPRISE!!! FUTURISTIC BATTLE SUIT DESTROY!!!

    I see a similarly ridiculous premise in many comic book movies and adventure flicks. How can they not be the most brilliant people in the world? Clearly they can design anything technologically impossible, perfect their control of their own bodies and minds, and totally kick ass...all before bed!

  • Bologner, on 07/25/2008, -9/+265Digg me up for using a funny line from the comic!
    • Magnus150, on 07/25/2008, -6/+10'kay
    • Tanktunker, on 07/25/2008, -2/+52Haha, I identify that line; dugg!
    • jonshipman, on 07/25/2008, -2/+14I too found that line exceptionally hilarious and in turn digg you up as well as the fellow above me for spotting the same line and agreeing to digg you!
    • necromancer13, on 07/25/2008, -0/+20Dayam.
    • Bologner, on 07/26/2008, -0/+6After coming back to read the comments, I in turn dugg everyone up.
    • michaelrsa, on 07/26/2008, -0/+3Ha ha, as with every other person replying I greatly enjoyed that line and digg you up.
    • jjohnstn, on 07/27/2008, -0/+1I have nothing of value to add, so please digg me down... no WAIT, UP, UP!!!!
  • tripledjr, on 07/25/2008, -15/+3LOL
  • vpshockwave, on 07/25/2008, -15/+5Bomb
  • FasmTrout, on 07/25/2008, -19/+6I would hardly call this a comic.
  • neocr0n, on 07/25/2008, -5/+68You could do that with most movies. Doesn't make them any less awesome to watch.
  • Chaotix, on 07/25/2008, -8/+1Heh good stuff :)
  • Tyrghast, on 07/25/2008, -21/+5Iron Man was great, so much more well-rounded than The Dark Knight.

    EDIT: Oh dear god this Peter Davis guy thinks waaaaaaaaaaay too much of himself. I'd hate to see how often he updates his Twitter.
    • Wiini, on 07/25/2008, -3/+4WTF are you talking about? I hope the joker kidnaps your ass and burns your face off.
  • NoFunBradley, on 07/25/2008, -3/+11Read it, first reaction DAYAM! And it's just not right having "The Dude" be the bad guy anyways.
    • diggduggDOOM, on 07/25/2008, -0/+7But that power armor really tied the room together...
    • dylio, on 07/26/2008, -0/+1They pissed on my power armor!
  • mleaman, on 07/25/2008, -11/+1Funny! Dugg
  • latrosicarius, on 07/25/2008, -4/+11Comic book movies are consistently awesome
    • GlitchEnzo, on 07/25/2008, -0/+3I love how the guy is rocking out with an N64 controller.
  • oRlyFOOL, on 07/25/2008, -2/+119the last block should have been Samuel L Jackson.
    caption: "what-up, I'm in Everything!"
    • passedoutghost, on 07/26/2008, -0/+8You forgot to add "*****" in there.
    • skyroket, on 07/26/2008, -0/+3I have HAD IT with these mutha *****' FUTURISTIC BATTLE SUITS on these MUTHA *****' GUYS!
  • Briii, on 07/25/2008, -3/+10Now i dont have to see the movie :)
  • 12D3, on 07/25/2008, -12/+67Iron Man? What the hell is that? As far as I am aware the only movie ever made is The Dark Knight.

    Then again, I get all my information from Digg.
    • walkertexas69, on 07/25/2008, -0/+62Then you should have been on digg 2-3 months ago when every single article was about Iron Man...
    • cesclaveria, on 07/25/2008, -3/+7then you must be new, because May was Stark's month here.
    • Wiini, on 07/25/2008, -2/+10And 2008 is Obama!
      • MasterGrief, on 07/25/2008, -1/+10Only the first half.

        Then there was FISA, and now everyone changed their minds.
    • Conquerist, on 07/25/2008, -0/+4And before that when it was Borat. Wa wa wee wa!
    • Skooma714, on 07/27/2008, -0/+1Dark Knight invented the comic book movie genre.
  • buckwilson, on 07/25/2008, -5/+142His take on Cloverfield is even better:
    http://speterdavis.com/mcomics_cloverfield.html
    • LordoftheLoo, on 07/25/2008, -1/+31Haha I actually laughed out loud reading that one, good job
    • Wiini, on 07/25/2008, -1/+25LOL I'm so glad you posted that. I laughed and laughed. much better than this one.
    • oxymoron69, on 07/25/2008, -1/+6Man, with this guy around I don't even need to see those ***** movies that get all hyped up to the nuts....
      well, except for the dark night, but that was a telesync.
    • xerograde, on 07/25/2008, -0/+5Wow, I haven't laughed like that in a while.
      • otbeverly, on 07/25/2008, -0/+2It was much better than "Cats." I'm going to read it again and again.
    • WheezyMustafa, on 07/25/2008, -2/+1I didn't even see that movie but that's how I envisioned it when I saw the previews.

      Thanks for posting that. :-)
    • dasdef, on 07/26/2008, -0/+3haha im so glad that i made it scroll down slowly.
  • themonkmob, on 07/25/2008, -15/+14Success! Now to go kill some muslims.
    • frepnog, on 07/25/2008, -0/+2yeah that is comedy gold right there, jerry. GOLD!
  • blinkatron, on 07/25/2008, -12/+11Surprise! It's a comic book movie! Of course it's not realistic.

    Buried for never hearing of "Suspending your disbelief."
    • Tanktunker, on 07/25/2008, -10/+3No comic book movie has ever been good at making the viewer suspend their disbelief, no, not even batman (bury me hard).
      • blinkatron, on 07/25/2008, -0/+2Well, maybe you can explain something to me then. Why DO robots like you even bother to go to movies then?
  • papastout, on 07/25/2008, -2/+56Dugg for Black Sabbath Photo and the onomatopaeic version of Ironman!

    DAAN DAAN DAANAANAAAN!!!
    DANANANANANANA DAANAANAAAN!!!
    • otbeverly, on 07/25/2008, -6/+2Thank you for saying that. I thought it was Led Zeppelin and almost made a fool of myself for not getting the joke before hitting reply.

      ... wait a secon-
    • jave8u, on 07/26/2008, -0/+3I guess I wasn't the only one who read through every "NANANA" in my head, making sure there were enough
  • BlaiseTheMan, on 07/25/2008, -4/+10something actually captured my attention for more then 2 mins that deserves a digg.
  • antiorblkflag9, on 07/25/2008, -9/+4Meh.....and his "pointless black sidekick" does have a point. He's becomes War Machine.
  • Wiini, on 07/25/2008, -13/+9The whole thing was funny but:

    "I'm a terrorist. Robert Downey Jr, I am going to kidnap you and force you to build me a weapon of mass destruction. With your bare hands. In a cave. With a box of spare parts. Even though your company is basically giving me free weapons anyway. "

    Wrong. In the movie it is revealed the kidnapped him and were meant to kill him at the request of the evil business partner overlord. The objective wasn't the weapon.
    • timoumd, on 07/25/2008, -0/+8But when they found out who their target was, then they wanted him to build the Jericho (that his company ultimately sold them anyways from when he decided to "go kill some muslims")
  • CYR1X, on 07/25/2008, -4/+10This isn't a comic.
    • CDRaff, on 07/25/2008, -0/+4Yeah that was my thought. Also this dude is obviously way better than anyone else, well at least according to his own blog.
    • jave8u, on 07/26/2008, -0/+1And because he is way better than us, it is a comic because that's what he calls them
  • InnerGalbladder, on 07/25/2008, -3/+5That was one of the funnier things i've read in a while.
  • amatyarakshasa, on 07/25/2008, -0/+7Hilarious! suspension of disbelief is what its about. Even in real life.
  • crazyjake, on 07/25/2008, -8/+35it is funny, but obviously this guy didn't pay too much attention to the movie.

    "Never fear! Not only am I a beautiful assistant, it turns out I am also a master hacker." -- She put a thumb drive in a computer...

    "I am going to kidnap you and force you to build me a weapon of mass destruction. With your bare hands. In a cave. With a box of spare parts." -- I personally wouldn't consider missiles to be classified as "a box of spare parts"

    "Gwyneth Paltrow! Hack into something and make it explode! " -- She pushed some buttons... that isn't hacking (unless you are going by Lifehacker's definition"
  • oo7evan, on 07/25/2008, -7/+2Finally, someone writes down my thoughts in comedic form. Thank you.
  • kingmanic, on 07/25/2008, -14/+11That was a synopsis not a comic. Here's a even more general one:

    We meet protagonist
    protagonist becomes hero
    Hero has some obstacle
    hero over comes obstacle
    the end
    • Magnus150, on 07/25/2008, -0/+19Why don't we get even more general?
      Beginning
      Middle
      End
    • pciulla, on 07/25/2008, -0/+14Or even more General?

      Movie
    • haldir2012, on 07/26/2008, -2/+0Got a, got a compelling protagonist?
      Got a, got a, got an obstacle for him to overcome?
      Little story brewin' there, you're working on?
      Working on that for quite some time, eh?
      Nice little narrative; beginning, middle and end?
      Some friends become enemies, some enemies become friends?
      At the end, your uh, main character is richer for the experience, yeah?
  • filth, on 07/25/2008, -3/+20Okay, I enjoyed the movie, but that was pretty freaking funny.
  • dnields, on 07/25/2008, -2/+7The last frame is the best.
    • GlitchEnzo, on 07/25/2008, -0/+1Yeah I love how he's using an N64 controller.
  • bencanfield, on 07/25/2008, -9/+2I thought I was the only one wondering why the ***** this movie made it anywhere near imdb's top 250.
  • FuckThaMeme, on 07/25/2008, -1/+30http://speterdavis.com/mcomics_legend.html
    "Hey, here's a question: How is it that all your lights and appliances are still working, when there are no humans alive to work the power plants?"
    "Why don't you shut the ***** up. You're a dog. "
    • gradivus, on 07/25/2008, -6/+6He has a room with a generator, they show it on screen and you can hear it running. This guy sucks, stupidest "funny" reviews ever. A raccoon in a cave with stone age tools could do better.
      • eSJayBee, on 07/26/2008, -0/+1Yea. I loved his Cloverfield one and his Iron Man one wasn't bad at all. But the "I Am Legend" one wasn't that funny and grossly inaccurate with the facts clearly stated/shown in the movie.
  • B3000, on 07/25/2008, -10/+3I liked Iron Man, but this was pretty funny. I would like to see what he has to say about the good but massively overrated The Dark Knight.
  • beermaker, on 07/25/2008, -9/+4better than the movie.. LOL!!!
  • bodegit, on 07/25/2008, -4/+2I too was skeptical about the possibility of creating advanced subatomic weapons in a cave with a hammer and screwdriver
  • mchisari, on 07/25/2008, -7/+4
    Can I just state for the record that I didn't think Iron Man was all that great? Definitely enjoyable. Good for a night out with some popcorn and a 64oz coke. But really nothing spectacular. On the level of Spider-man or so. Good, enjoyable, good origin story, but nothing that great. Here's to hoping the sequel is better.
    • ahawks, on 07/25/2008, -2/+4Here's hoping no sequel.
    • btschul, on 07/25/2008, -0/+4I agree with your summation of Iron Man, but there is no way it was worse than Spider Man. Especially after that emo spiderman with the black suit and the gay hair in the third movie. http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/070626/emo ...
      • mchisari, on 07/25/2008, -0/+1
        By Spider-man, I meant the first movie in the trilogy. Spider-man 2 was better than Iron man. Spider-man 3 was absolute crap.
    • jonshipman, on 07/25/2008, -3/+3Ironman is so badass his name lacks a hyphen.
    • innovati, on 07/26/2008, -1/+1a 64 oz coke! that's almost 2 litres! and if you're in the US they use High-fructose corn syrup to sweeten the pop which makes you fat!

      wow, all you should need for an evening is 12oz
      • mchisari, on 07/26/2008, -0/+1
        I was joking, don't worry. Although, they do sell 64 oz coke here in the US.

        "Among 7-Eleven's offerings are private label products, including Slurpee, a partially frozen beverage introduced in 1967[2], and the Big Gulp introduced in 1980[2] that packaged soft drinks in large cups ranging in size from 20 to 64 fluid ounces."
  • ahawks, on 07/25/2008, -11/+6Finally someone else sees movie how I did. Yeah it was "cool" when you turn off you brain, but it had way too many groaner moments.

    Like when he built a suite out of spare parts under supervision
    And then fell from the sky in it onto the ground, and didn't die
    And then built rocket shoes, and flew himself into a concrete ceiling at 100mph and lived.
    And how his heart was somehow replaced with a magical power generator that powers his suite and removes shrapnel from his body, but you can remove it and the effect is like kryptonite, even though you just took his heart out. Putting it back in fixes everything of course.

    Bleh
    • sixsidepentagon, on 07/25/2008, -1/+5Go back to the 7th grade, look up suspension of disbelief, then come back. It's okay to feel like a retard.
      And wow. Er, dude, the "magical generator" didn't replace his heart, it was keeping shrapnel from getting to it (it powered an electromagnet. Way to not pay any attention during the movie, you certainly did turn off your brain. And it's still off.
    • jonshipman, on 07/25/2008, -1/+5He has a bunch of tiny metal shrapnel in his body. The electromagnet in him keeps the metal from collecting in his heart and stopping it. Putting it back in draws the metal back to the magnet.
    • DarkSpoon, on 07/25/2008, -1/+4it wasn't a replacement heart. he still had his heart. it was an electric magnet hooked to a car battery to keep the shrapnel close to the skin and away from his heart. he later converted the battery to the glowing miniature power plant that made enough power to run his suit as well as prevent the shrapnel from entering his heart. this was all explained in the movie btw.
    • FSTRM, on 07/26/2008, -0/+0does anyone know that this was a movie? not a documentary?
  • petaganayr, on 07/25/2008, -6/+4Even though Tony's house is super high-tech, anybody could just walk in and out of it.
    • bagboyrebel, on 07/25/2008, -0/+4The only people who got in on their own were the people he trusted, who probably were given access, and Nick Fury, who is in SHIELD.
  • blademanx, on 07/25/2008, -3/+4The Sweeney Todd comic is definitely the best.
  • Aaronontheweb, on 07/25/2008, -1/+12He forgot to include the mandatory bonus scene at the end of the credits.
  • totosushi, on 07/25/2008, -2/+0I liked it when Rod Hilton did it first.
  • blacklilyninja, on 07/25/2008, -6/+1i lol'd


    i pooped myself
  • swings1940, on 07/25/2008, -6/+1Very funny, kudos on being so sarcastic. Dayam!
  • dusingaz, on 07/25/2008, -8/+1thanks for saying [COMIC] so I know not to look at this, I hate comics.
    • lolwutpear, on 07/26/2008, -0/+2good thing it's not actually a comic
  • ehudokai, on 07/25/2008, -6/+1the most accurate portrayal of the movie yet!
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