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Cognition and Memory Tests: How Smart Are You?

portfolio.com — The words come in a rapid, random progression on the computer screen: "POET," "BEACH," "ATTENDANT," "JURY," "CAVE" … there are 15 in all. I’m watching them tick by one by one, slightly panicked that I am going to forget them.

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  • kyle212, on 06/22/2008, -1/+4This is just the primacy recency effect
    • 36CrzyFsts, on 06/22/2008, -0/+0You used the word primacy so i +digg you sir...
  • XchrisX, on 06/22/2008, -0/+54I failed the test. I wasn't able to figure out how to create a login to take the test.
    • mikeleeuk, on 06/22/2008, -6/+1"No account? Create one" - it's not rocket science.
      • dcshiderly, on 06/22/2008, -0/+0Apparently the password's string processing logic is... no matter what I put it rejects it. Eight or more characters, alphanumeric only. FAIL
    • thundacracka, on 06/22/2008, -0/+8I took me about 5 minutes to figure out how to register. Ohhhh, DD/MM/YYYY format! Not, MM/DD/YYYY format. Epic fail.
      • Coffeedemon, on 06/22/2008, -0/+5Wouldn't be an issue if they all used YYYY/MM/DD (ISO)
    • gnotDigger, on 06/22/2008, -1/+1every character i use for a password is invalid! lulz
  • ithejosh, on 06/22/2008, -2/+9OK, This is lame.
  • djixl, on 06/22/2008, -0/+20the test says im a 25 year old with an 18 year old brain.

    burying myself for inadequacy.
    • doublejay1973, on 06/22/2008, -0/+6dugg this comment because I was told never to bury feelings of inadequacy.
    • 1337chic, on 06/22/2008, -0/+2On BrainAge this is good. . .
    • NecroDigg, on 06/22/2008, -0/+218 is the best score you can get.
      • doctechnical, on 06/22/2008, -0/+9Uh-oh. I got bored and started pressing buttons at random on the last part of the test and I got 18.

        And I'm hung over.

        This does not bode well for eighteen-year-olds.
    • praisethelard, on 06/22/2008, -0/+2Yeah, I got 18, too. They don't even explain what the hell the "brain age" correlates to.
  • Teloe, on 06/22/2008, -5/+26I'm 14 but have the mind of a 63 year old...I'm not sure how to take it.
    • Zounas, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1You die young.
    • cheeseplease, on 06/22/2008, -0/+5One word: Alzheimer's
      • doctechnical, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1The gift that keeps on giving, because you forget you already have it.
    • Onyxblaze, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1I'm 15 and I got 73. Then again I havn't slept in a while... I fell asleep half way trough.
    • insertnamehere, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1stop smoking heroin
    • reland1, on 06/22/2008, -0/+2you will be pleasantly surprised that 63 is a good age...(at least my hubby thinks so)
      I will be 62 soon and I've still got a little zip left!
  • doublejay1973, on 06/22/2008, -0/+11buried because you need a login and I can't think of a gag about it.
  • willdelaney, on 06/22/2008, -0/+9This is like a lame version of brain age
  • brokenex, on 06/22/2008, -0/+2Subject matter is interesting the article itself is lame
  • masterm1nd, on 06/22/2008, -0/+3I have a feeling I'm not the only one who quit after the "press the right arrow when you see YES on the screen test"
  • Ghorkvos, on 06/22/2008, -0/+5 I quit when I realized there was a second page.
  • wesb, on 06/22/2008, -1/+46Username: digguser
    Password: digguser

    Right-handed.
  • djcreamy, on 06/22/2008, -2/+9I'm a 27yr old with the brain of a 66yr old man in a wheelchair with Lou Gehrig's disease.
    • friendlyman, on 06/22/2008, -1/+1Look on the positive side....at least you can rent ultra porn.
    • zippy757, on 06/22/2008, -6/+2not funny
    • chappanchuri, on 06/22/2008, -1/+3On the bright side, you can now write wildly successful non fiction books on astronomy and be parodied on the Simpsons.
  • Tiltmenot, on 06/22/2008, -4/+217 with the brain of a 70 year old... good or bad? I did drink a lot last night though.
  • qyzp12345, on 06/22/2008, -2/+1good！！
  • progator74, on 06/22/2008, -5/+133 with the brain of a 74 year old...
  • joebloe3000, on 06/22/2008, -3/+124 year old with the brain of a 35 year old
    • bertrancito, on 06/22/2008, -0/+0Beat you : 25 / 34... not so proud though :(
  • unknownohm, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1I got a pop-up blocker and said screw it, and I agree with willdelany, it probably is a lame version of brain age. I play the game memory with my 10 year old sister and she whoops my ass
  • totallydismayed, on 06/22/2008, -0/+11Took the test. Completely lame. Buried for ridiculousness.
  • Rogozhin, on 06/22/2008, -0/+9Your brain's age cannot be determined.

    What?
  • Rudegar, on 06/22/2008, -6/+0i took the test and all i got was 100+ spam mails about organ donating :S
    • chazza125, on 06/22/2008, -0/+9How is that possible? You didn't even need to enter an email.
      • doctechnical, on 06/22/2008, -0/+4Holy *****, that brain test IS good! It reads your brain!
  • helloyo, on 06/22/2008, -3/+0I got 79? So I'm assuming higher is better... But seriously, I didn't do as bad as a 79 year old would have, so how's it work?
  • ReignInMud, on 06/22/2008, -2/+0Took this test stoned and wanting a cigarette. 20 and have a 56. But hey, the test was fun.
  • HyperJack, on 06/22/2008, -2/+116 with brain of a 34 year old.
    how the hell do we know if its good or not?
  • Dundasbro, on 06/22/2008, -4/+2I got 18 and I'm 17, not that bad really. I kept on coming up short on some because I kept on trying to find a pattern in how they came up or tried to think of ways to make my brain associate no with left and yes with right. Oh and I seem to have the word YES burnt into my retina at this point.
    • Coffeedemon, on 06/22/2008, -2/+3So you kept doing it till you got a score you felt good enough about to post? Don't think they are supposed to work like that.
      • Hexoddz, on 06/22/2008, -0/+2No, he meant he attempted to come up with patterns during the test. I tried the same thing, but they appeared at random.
      • Dundasbro, on 06/23/2008, -0/+1Hexoddz is right, I did it once but got distracted at times because I was trying to guess the next one that would come up, or trying to work out how to associate a yes or a no with each respective hand. I only did the test once though.
  • DocHoliday22, on 06/22/2008, -3/+4I took the test and realized I have twitchy fingers... I'm 27 and have the brain age of an 80-year-old.... ***** test die!
    • laconix, on 06/22/2008, -1/+2I'm 17 and have the brain of an 80 year old. I also realised I have twitchy fingers, I'd press an arrow key even when nothing was being displayed.
      • christhechris, on 06/22/2008, -0/+220 and brain 80....but I've been studying statistics all day...I blame that...
    • viruz, on 06/22/2008, -1/+1I'm 33 with an 80, I think we should all go out and hang in the mall for 12 hours drinking coffee with all the other 80 year olds.

      I blame waking up 10 minutes ago for being so old.
  • DocHoliday22, on 06/22/2008, -0/+11"Performance of these tests can be affected by a number of factors including: Fatigue, Noise and distractions, Boredom, Use of nicotine, alcohol or caffeine, Use of illicit drugs."

    I qualify for all of the above...
    • Sinnic, on 06/23/2008, -0/+1Taking this test variously inebriated caused me to realize how ***** up I must be to sober people.
  • kkiram, on 06/22/2008, -4/+5i'm 21 and my brain age is 80. awesome.
  • Harrison88, on 06/22/2008, -4/+222 and I'm 19. Not bad.
  • c89a, on 06/22/2008, -4/+524 and I'm 18. Damn it all. Im going not going to drink anymore...or any less ;)
  • Grimlock82, on 06/22/2008, -4/+326 with a 53 year old brain ...
    Dammit I skipped my mid-life crisis!!
  • dexedrine, on 06/22/2008, -2/+153 ?!?! sigh.....
  • Complexium, on 06/22/2008, -1/+1Very
  • dawgma, on 06/22/2008, -0/+7BUT WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN???
  • schweinehundXX, on 06/22/2008, -0/+7***** multiplayer online games making me click even when there's nothing.
  • baylat, on 06/22/2008, -2/+121 with a brain of null
  • NecroDigg, on 06/22/2008, -2/+1I'm 18 and I scored 18. I think lower must be better (your brain deteriorates as you age, an 80 year old has crappy reactions)
  • Wartz, on 06/22/2008, -0/+3where the hell is the link to actually try it?
    • surfacewound, on 06/22/2008, -0/+10Your brain's age is blonde.
      • Wartz, on 06/22/2008, -1/+2Ah I see, it required javascript to be viewable.

        edit: I have to make an account? ***** that, not going to bother.
  • NecroDigg, on 06/22/2008, -1/+3I did the test again, but this time I failed on purpose (taking like 5 seconds to respond). I ended up with a score of 80.
    How the ***** did you guys manage to get 80 when actually trying?
    • seventhc, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1I did the same thing and I also got 80. I let 'YES' sit there for up to a minute before pressing the arrow key, the results probably should have been like...'dude, you are dead'.
      I tried it without any interaction at all, but it wont work that way, so I just did the worst I could do. Most likely 80 is probably the cut off point, as mine should have been like 107 but then again they don't have enough 107 year old people to justify how they came up with that number.
      • SuckMyDigg, on 06/22/2008, -1/+3I think it automatically gives you 80 if you screw up once.
  • 4eloBek, on 06/22/2008, -2/+1The age of your brain has been calculated to be: 18 and i am 40
    even though i have failed on second test...
  • shrewduser, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1tha fact that it runs in flash full screen probably skews the results (laggy and slow on my pc)
  • tyshro, on 06/22/2008, -0/+3Is there an age test for the rest of your body?
    • mlbwebdesign, on 06/22/2008, -0/+0Yeah, it's called marriage. I've been married for almost 3 years and I feel 80. My brain scored 18 on that lame test tho.
  • diggdong, on 06/22/2008, -2/+1I haven't taken the test because I too lazy to create a log in to a site I will never visit again. Having the brain of an 80 yr old as an accomplishment sounds like a seriously flawed goal. Perhaps, the peramiders of the study do not include all the glories the average 80 yr old has to struggle with in our complicated user friendly society.
  • Unr3a1, on 06/22/2008, -0/+3Everyone that uses this login will get a brain age of 80. Don't waste your time.
  • SuckMyDigg, on 06/22/2008, -3/+2I'm 24 and I have the brain of an 80 year old...

    I must be wise beyond my years
  • 404digg, on 06/22/2008, -0/+2There is no universally accepted method for determining intelligence. "intelligence" is a social construct.
  • Metasquares, on 06/22/2008, -0/+1The article appears to describe a simple test of memory. While this is useful, as memory and giftedness are believed to be correlated, it is more useful to administer a working memory test; that is, one that introduces a distraction in between the memorization and recall. This requires the brain to keep track of a set of objects even while processing a different stimulus.
  • omikjam, on 06/22/2008, -3/+1I'm 25 and apparently my brain is that of a 77-year old. That explains a thing or two..
  • Krissam, on 06/22/2008, -3/+1ugh... 20 year old with a 28 year old brain, and i thought my result was bad :/
  • DocHoliday22, on 06/22/2008, -2/+6I'm a crack addict so I blame my score of 80 on that
  • notoneofus, on 06/22/2008, -3/+1I'm 36 with an 18 year old brain. Drinking while I took the test. Evidently, that helps.
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