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25 Signs You Have Grown Up

divinecaroline.com — My two favorites...#1 Your houseplants are alive, and you can ’t smoke any of them and #5 You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

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  • MTessa, on 10/15/2007, -39/+12Not on the list but how about when your favorite bands are no longer together. Well Smashing Pumpkins did recently get back together but it's really only Billy....Others, Black Crowes, Blind Melon..You get the idea.

    Unfortunately my houseplants are dead and I still can't smoke any of them.
    • AlexBellisBrown, on 10/10/2007, -2/+37You worry about money and you know Santa cant bail you out anymore....
    • socketscientist, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4Your favourite bands are no longer together? How about when they start to retire!
    • Elranzer, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4"First published: September 2007"

      Yeah, right.
  • lailalu, on 10/10/2007, -2/+71Im so scared for the day i hear a song i love in the elevator. All the other signs say that im a grown up. DAMN.
    • BalooUrsidae, on 10/10/2007, -1/+18I heard a Muzak version of NIN's Closer in an elevator in Portland back in the late 1990s when I was in high school. I haven't been able to look at Trent the same way since.
      • zmjone2992, on 10/10/2007, -1/+7whaaaa?
        • adrianmonk, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Because for a song to become Muzak, the person who owns the rights to it has to agree to it. Which some people think of as "selling out". (Although personally I think that if you are a professional musician in the first place, little harm is done by allowing your music to be produced in versions that people won't take seriously anyway.)
    • offwithyourtv, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1I heard a song I like at Macy's not long ago. I think it's a sign that elevators are next.
    • benaa, on 10/10/2007, -1/+0Actually no worries yet. Digging for 2 hours a date totally negates all the other signs.
    • bib4tuna, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1anyone hear that light rock cover of 'float on'? creepy
    • jer2eydevil88, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2I'll probably make an ass out of myself if I hear Buck Cherry - Crazy Bitch playing in an elevator.
  • socialdork, on 10/10/2007, -5/+22That was worth it. lol.
  • jessicageorge, on 10/15/2007, -1/+154How about when you buy hair die it isn't a primary color :)
    • pcgmr, on 10/10/2007, -3/+6i dont think i could ever stop doing that.
    • FTLJohnson, on 10/10/2007, -13/+5So, green, orange, and purple haired folks are more mature in your mind? What is it about secondary colors that adds that extra little bit of class?
      • hobonetweaver, on 10/10/2007, -2/+14Nice try, but you used a little -too- much stupid.
        • FTLJohnson, on 10/10/2007, -1/+8People on Digg just don't like jokes about the colored.
    • lex0nyc, on 10/10/2007, -0/+46dye
    • kahrytan, on 10/10/2007, -4/+2More like, You know you're grown up when you use hair color that closely matches your natural hair color.
      • Firehed, on 10/10/2007, -0/+11Who'd dye their hair a grayer gray?
      • patrickloggins, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3...and there goes the joke. Ruined.
  • stignordas, on 10/11/2007, -4/+82Haha! 20. A four dollar bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good *****.”

    too true... too true...
    • Tomboys, on 10/10/2007, -1/+10LOL... Guess I still have some growing to do.
    • jcaino, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2i hit em all except for the waking at 6am part. i work evenings, so thats to be expected...
    • bg2500, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3I remember drinking Boones Farm in high school. Now being 27, I could not imagine ever drinking it again. At least we didn't drink Thunderbird though.
    • vertinox, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Really? I'd pay $50 to get my hands on a Zima once again. I can't believe they stop making that drink.
    • reddikilowatt, on 10/10/2007, -0/+12 Buck Chuck
  • JulieBrownfield, on 10/10/2007, -14/+5Or you have to buy hair, ala toupee
  • taylorkt, on 10/11/2007, -3/+84How about you have sex in a bed.
    • insinuate, on 10/10/2007, -1/+11in a house. heh, cause that matress in the back of my truck is pretty sweet.
  • muchomass, on 10/10/2007, -40/+2I'd rather kill myself than turn 30.
    • GenghisCohen, on 10/15/2007, -2/+34Please use a large caliber gun.
    • jnisme, on 10/10/2007, -1/+9Wow, we have something in common. I'd rather you did too.
    • grenden, on 10/10/2007, -0/+9Make sure you get your whole head in front of the shotgun, and keep thinking to yourself that the world will be better off without you here. Plus, you're breathing my air. And you smell. (wow aren't I an *****?)
    • trer, on 10/10/2007, -0/+6No one here is going to stop you. Please jump into the ocean so that we don't have to spend tax money cleaning up your mess.
    • CeeJayDK, on 10/10/2007, -0/+6Comments like that are signs that you are not old enough.
    • Thumper13, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3I'd rather shoot myself then be whatever useless age you are. The 5 years I've spent in my 30's have been the best years in my life.
      Damn was I an idiot in my 20's.
      Oh, and a little over half of this list applies to me.
    • itsthebrod, on 10/10/2007, -1/+5When slitting your wrists, remember this invaluable fact: it's down the highway, not across the street. Tootles!
  • Bajayjay, on 10/11/2007, -1/+132Your food doens't come in fun shapes anymore. Why is that?
    • reganreganpaul, on 10/10/2007, -19/+3aren't strawberries & champange a fun shape?
      • mattcoady, on 10/10/2007, -0/+40Pfff.... not until it looks like a raptors or t-rex.
        • turquoisefish, on 10/10/2007, -1/+2Grown ups can still have turkey dinosaurs and potato smilies can't they?
  • sashapave, on 10/10/2007, -2/+11I eat more with my fingers these days.
  • tambird, on 10/11/2007, -4/+242For me, it was when I realized that I had no furniture made of plywood and cement block. At one point in my "youth" I had two TVs - one on top of the other. The one on the bottom had picture but no sound. The one on top had sound but no picture. I think I grew up when I graduated to an "all in one".
    • adrianmonk, on 10/10/2007, -0/+21My grandparents had that, but only because they couldn't bring themselves to get rid of their nice, quality television-as-furniture set with the real wood and all that.

      In turn, the fact that I actually remember television sets that straddled the line between furniture and electronics itself makes me feel old.
    • philiaC, on 10/10/2007, -3/+2ITT jokes stolen from stand up comedians.
  • satanatnmtedu, on 10/10/2007, -24/+1026. You have seen this list several times.
    • jtbandes, on 10/10/2007, -3/+8That would be 27. Read the effing article.
      • getrealnow, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1why the ***** say effing? just say *****
  • purty707, on 10/10/2007, -41/+225. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking “Oh ***** what the hell happened?”
  • notsosmart, on 10/10/2007, -2/+64You go to bbqs not parties.
  • lordterrin, on 10/10/2007, -35/+120. A four dollar bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good *****.”
    • mattcoady, on 10/10/2007, -0/+55Thank you, I temporarily went blind when I reached that part of the list.
  • cindylauper, on 10/11/2007, -4/+106Ninety percent of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work...don't think thats gonna apply to a lot of people on digg
    • digghandyman, on 10/10/2007, -0/+33Well, we still do it AT work :)
    • BalooUrsidae, on 10/10/2007, -0/+8I'm not sure that's a "getting old" thing so much as a "baby boomer and older" thing.
  • hiPpymIck, on 10/10/2007, -9/+1id say these are things you find when you settle down

    but useful for making you a good dependable reliable parent maybe
    (...no alternative ha)
  • raycosmo, on 10/10/2007, -14/+2It should say grown old not grown up, not the same thing
  • TimidTiger, on 10/10/2007, -18/+1325 signs you're dead on the inside
    • tamurlane6, on 10/10/2007, -4/+22ooh I know.
      1. you can see maggots moving under your skin
      • adooga, on 10/10/2007, -0/+72. Your body mass liquifies and seeps out your orifices.
        • skyfire1, on 10/10/2007, -1/+73. You can't see.
          • adrianmonk, on 10/10/2007, -0/+44. A bunch of people have shown up, and -- for once -- it's because they're thinking of you *and* saying nice things about you.
          • CeeJayDK, on 10/10/2007, -0/+94. You've a got a craving for fresh brainssssss.
  • alexra, on 10/10/2007, -13/+4i haven't grown up yet
  • binorgog, on 08/07/2008, -20/+8You pay for sex, because it's easier and more fun than your partner.
    • Me1000, on 10/10/2007, -0/+10or because you dont have a partner...
      • kahrytan, on 10/10/2007, -7/+3That applies to most of digg.
        • hobonetweaver, on 10/10/2007, -0/+11This sort of comment is like AIDS. It's viral, but it's not funny.
          • Hoogs, on 10/10/2007, -0/+2Thanks for saying this, I've been getting sick of doing it. (Disregard my previous post, I meant to post it here.)
        • Hoogs, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Thanks for saying this, I've been getting sick of doing it.
  • SmartyTousers, on 10/11/2007, -9/+18you travel for work.
    you use the stove and not the microwave
    You know what a travel mug is
    you may have a cussing jar vs a tip jar
    You realize how crazy it is to tip someone for filling a coffee cup at Starbucks.
    • jack45208, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Nice... all good, all right.
    • offwithyourtv, on 10/10/2007, -2/+10You had me until the Starbucks one. Perhaps I'm just biased because I once worked at one when I was an undergrad. You don't tip a barista because filling a coffee cup takes effort. It doesn't. You tip baristas because they're really ***** broke. This assumes you're making more money than the barista, which you likely do if you're a "grown-up." It's just a nice thing to do. Maybe he/she is trying to help pay for college. You never know.
      • inspecality, on 10/10/2007, -2/+4So because they really need the money, we should just give it to them. Makes sense. /s
        • offwithyourtv, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1You certainly don't have to. It's just the nice thing to do. Now that I'm no longer broke, I tend to tip well. Like I said, perhaps I'm biased because I've actually been in their shoes and had to work for low wages before. We can't all be privileged straight out of the womb.
      • meggygrl112, on 10/10/2007, -1/+0I worked at a place that tipped... I actually used to tip BETTER before I worked there... now I only tip well if it's been earned.
  • BedlamX, on 10/11/2007, -16/+85Bonus: You become a republican.
  • mediaspree, on 10/22/2007, -13/+127#27 You read this list on the internet 5 years ago
  • ascheinberg, on 10/10/2007, -9/+75Ah... just as funny today as it was in 1999 when I first read it.
  • mal1964, on 10/10/2007, -0/+751) You need reading glasses to read list.
    • tempurasama, on 10/10/2007, -4/+5sorry, but that doesn't mean you've grown up... it means you've grown old.
  • duniyadnd, on 10/10/2007, -1/+15They missed the... "they had real music back in my day" quote. I guess the elevator music comes close... damnit!!
  • TheBigL481, on 10/10/2007, -15/+3I don't understand how the ***** this was meant to be funny. It just stated steriotypical life changes that happen to people when they are older. None of them were funny :/ And some were directly taken from a previous 'Top ....' list, about being a student.
    • mrjit, on 10/10/2007, -1/+12Wow, lighten the ***** up or something. It was pretty humorous because us somewhat "grown up" people relate to it and go.. damn, I really don't know when Taco Bell closes anymore when I used to know every single fast food places closing time..
    • iFungus, on 10/10/2007, -0/+5I guess you're either 10 years old, or over 50.
    • grenden, on 10/10/2007, -2/+4Top Sign You're an Elderly Person: You lose your sense of humor about stupid lists, and it gets to you so much that you have to make sure everyone knows you've lost it by commenting about it. (and is jealous that he can't find anything to submit that gets to the frontpage (check http://www.digg.com/users/TheBigL481 )
  • DirtySnachez, on 10/10/2007, -3/+16026. The age difference between you and the girls you jack-off to is in double digits.
    • skyfire1, on 10/10/2007, -4/+72Hi, I'm Chris Hasen from Dateline. Have a seat.
      • thedragon4453, on 10/10/2007, -3/+9Im Chriiiiiiisssss Haaannnseeennnn.
        /south park
        • nato64, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4That was a fantastic episode. Props for referencing it.
        • po43292, on 10/10/2007, -0/+4Yeah it was pretty *COCCKKK ***** PUSSY* good.
    • clark24, on 10/10/2007, -1/+9Sad... but in about 3 more years that will be true.
    • stignordas, on 10/10/2007, -0/+13So, um, where's 'Loney&boredHomeAlone15' and what's with all the cameras?
    • Tathar, on 10/10/2007, -6/+1No, that's just a warning sign that you're a pedo.
      • Firehed, on 10/10/2007, -0/+17Only if you're 22. Pedos salivate over prepubescent kids, not 17-year-olds.
    • smallfry189, on 10/10/2007, -2/+2Well, technically that's true...and I'm 14. O,o
  • evanct, on 10/10/2007, -14/+419. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not robitussin and benadryl.

    fix'd
    • hobonetweaver, on 10/10/2007, -1/+3That's just when you wake up and realize you should stop ***** your brain with pharms.
  • stignordas, on 10/10/2007, -1/+52These days I check out a volvo and think... 'pretty hot volvo... pretty hot...'
    • homedaddy, on 10/11/2007, -1/+17lol.... reminds me of when I first spotted my sweet minivan
      • mrjit, on 10/10/2007, -0/+9I almost bought a Pacifica and my girlfriend at the time asked why I wanted to look like an old man.. Supportive gfs ftw.
    • Nerfdude, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1i recently went car shopping. i found myself looking at saab 9-3 and 9-5's. then i wound up with an acura, and it's not an integra or RSX.

      what happened?
    • zspeed78, on 10/10/2007, -2/+1Im about to buy my parents Volvo S80.. after I sell my M3 ! Now, IM OLD.
  • jnisme, on 10/10/2007, -1/+36It was a sad day in my life when I heard the music that I listened to being played on the local "Classic Rock" station. After reading that list, I'm even more depressed. Oh well. It's almost 9:00, time for bed (as opposed to starting to get ready to go out as it once was).
  • mrjit, on 10/10/2007, -1/+41I no long have any interest in having booming subwoofers in my trunk... And when someone cranks up the radio I "can't think".. :[
    • offwithyourtv, on 10/10/2007, -0/+8I think my subs may be with me for life. It's in my genes. My dad's are louder than my own, and he's 51.
      • tnoy, on 10/10/2007, -0/+11Thats just because he cant hear them as well anymore.
      • Nerfdude, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3that's because hearing loss is permanent.
      • Mike89, on 10/10/2007, -4/+1That may be true, if you're a wog.
  • pyrix86, on 10/10/2007, -4/+10Dugg for number 26.

    Hehe... old people.
  • Lister169, on 10/10/2007, -0/+48You remember the latest movie remake from when it originally premiered the first time around.
  • heinousjay, on 10/10/2007, -8/+24That seems more like "25 signs you've become a useless suburbanite hoser" to me. I suppose it makes people feel better to call themselves grown-up, but the real word is old.
    • lordtyros, on 10/10/2007, -9/+7Grow up.
      • heinousjay, on 10/10/2007, -4/+11If growing up means I need to change everything about myself to turn into a (as the following comment states, more eloquently than my own) "middle-of-the-road consumption-focused idiot" then I'm happy to remain a child.

        Naturally, people who have committed themselves to this bland existence want everyone else to join them. I've noticed that nothing grates on people who have given up on living life like it's worth living than seeing someone who is.
    • RobotBuddha, on 10/10/2007, -0/+9Well said. You don't actually have to become dull, or stop doing new and interesting things when you reach a certain age. But damn, do the people who give up their life hate it when others keep on with it.
  • adooga, on 10/10/2007, -6/+32This could be called "25 signs you're a middle-of-the-road consumption-focused idiot and even in your youth you were nothing more than that in any meaningful way either".
  • segovia101, on 10/10/2007, -9/+5927. You realise you've seen this list about 200 million times usually in emails sent around in work
    28. Everyone in your office thinks it hilarious and laughs out loud repeating their favourites even though they've probably seen it 199 million times
    29. You realize you are surrounded by morons
    • segovia101, on 10/10/2007, -0/+25Bonus: Another little piece of your soul shrivels up and dies
  • harlowsmonkeys, on 10/10/2007, -0/+8You haven't started a sentence (out loud or in your mind) with "when I grow up" in a long time.
  • menwuur, on 10/10/2007, -1/+49Oh man, digg has been reduced to a myspace bulletin
    • magnetarc, on 10/10/2007, -1/+22Like you know what myspace is, Dad!!
  • Raids, on 10/10/2007, -2/+7Yeah... not one of those applies to me :D
  • skyfire1, on 10/10/2007, -3/+1I haven't grown up obviously. I'm the opposite of everything here.
  • Empyrean, on 10/10/2007, -3/+7More like "25 Signs You've Become a Prude".
    • offwithyourtv, on 10/10/2007, -1/+1Yeah! Taking naps and eating breakfast are totally for prudes!! ...um...
  • sych0, on 10/10/2007, -1/+24Mmm 16. You take naps

    Naps are the meaning of life.
    • andrew7667, on 10/10/2007, -0/+5The same thing applies to college students though. Mmm...naps.
  • jizzlies, on 10/10/2007, -12/+0That was pretty interesting. How about these "10 Signs it is Time to Break Up With Your Girlfriend" (http://www.bofads.com/stories/breakup.htm)?
  • jizzlies, on 10/10/2007, -8/+3Sorry, the link didn't work. It is
    http://www.bofads.com/stories/breakup.htm
    • LostnTransition, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1Not to cut anyone down but this "guide" is anything but that. It more than a little inaccurate. How exactly is "She asks what you did last night: Well, it shows that she is interested in your life." A bad thing, I guess this is more of a guide to 1 night stands and avoiding commitment than it is a guide to bad girlfriends. Certain points are valid but certainly few and far between.
      • sjohnson0881, on 10/10/2007, -1/+0I think it was supposed to be a joke. I hope no one follows that advice! I thought it was pretty funny though.
    • sjohnson0881, on 10/10/2007, -0/+0I think it was supposed to be a joke. At least I hope so. If you look at their Wedding Guide, it also seems tounge and cheek:
      http://www.bofads.com/stories/wedding.htm
    • jizzlies, on 10/10/2007, -1/+0I just thought it was funny. No way am I actually doing that stuff!
  • 37prime, on 10/10/2007, -3/+10"#5 You hear your favorite song in an elevator."

    What if the song is Aerosmith's "Love in an Elevator"?
  • froggiestone, on 10/10/2007, -3/+3924. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

    wtf ? i've done that since i was like 15 :/
    • IsoJanis, on 10/10/2007, -0/+3I didn't get this one either, I've done that as long as I can remember.
    • JamaicaJames, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1no doubt, we call that "pre-game"
      • Mike89, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1We call it "pre-drinking", or "pre-drink drinks", but it's the same thing :P.
    • RockinRoel, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1#24 is what youngsters do, older people don't. It's so stupid. In Belgium we call it "voordrinken", or pre-drinking. The purpose is: drinking a lot of alcohol up front so you'll get drunk much faster. Getting drunk is not the right reason for drinking, in my opinion. Note that I'm 18, not some old guy looking down on teenagers.
  • cabazorro, on 10/10/2007, -8/+3Strongly believe that today sci-fi is garbage and dream of electric sheep.
  • hardstyle, on 10/10/2007, -0/+1You find yourself listening to Radio 2 instead of Radio 1
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