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Boy Genius Finishes College at Age 10; Starts Crappy Job at Age 11

usedwigs.com — Mozart wrote his first concerto at age five. Tiger Woods learned to play golf at three. And now Madison, New Jersey ’s own child prodigy Jason Park is stuck in a crappy job at age 11.

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  • smurfz, on 11/14/2007, -29/+147That's terrible, the kids only 11 years old and working 70 hours a week? Isn't that somehow illegal?
    • planktonx, on 11/14/2007, -13/+2Child exploitation? Child labor.
      • bs0l, on 11/13/2007, -0/+3I always thought New Jersey had child labor laws.

        And I've been living here for all these years....
        • antibastard, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2you call that living?
          • Charlotte_Web, on 11/13/2007, -0/+4More fake news, dugg to the home page....
    • raitchison, on 11/14/2007, -0/+77I would be illegal if it were true, surprised this isn't on the Onion.
    • mojaam, on 11/14/2007, -23/+2Finishing college at age 10 is somehow illegal.
      • G-RaZoR, on 11/14/2007, -0/+2Post Secondary schools don't have age requirements.
    • robbh66, on 11/14/2007, -1/+129People on Digg are such suckers for made up news.
      • nepawoods, on 11/14/2007, -0/+20Really. I thought for sure I was reading The Onion when I read this:

        “Now, I got sixty years of crunching numbers and drinking bad coffee at client sites to look forward to. Whoopde-frickin-do. Look at these bags under my eyes… Christ almighty.”
      • randydaytona, on 11/13/2007, -19/+11Hmm they fall for obviously fake news and support Ron Paul...
      • Obligation, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1It's just as funny to see the ones who realize it isn't real totally miss that it's a joke.
    • AriaStar, on 11/14/2007, -17/+10"“I never really thought about what I wanted to do after my schooling,” said a visibly tired Park as he unclips his necktie and downs chocolate milk at McSorley’s Pub in Manhattan where he and some of his colleagues meet for the occasional drink after work."

      Even a genius wouldn't be allowed into a pub at 10. Fake.
      • mrfreeziexp, on 11/14/2007, -1/+37You're a fast one.
      • mushroomsrmagic, on 11/13/2007, -6/+4actually, you can. as long as you're accompanied by an adult 25 or older who isn't drinking. at least that's how it is in pennsylvania.
        • probrian, on 11/13/2007, -2/+4I think the pub was in...Manhattan though right?
      • knetworx, on 11/13/2007, -0/+6Your powers of deduction are astounding!
    • swiftekho, on 11/14/2007, -2/+16I stopped reading after I saw the student loans part... Any kid at age 10 that could complete his MBA would have gotten a free ride, easily...
      • thecorch, on 11/13/2007, -0/+4You read THAT far before you figured out it was a joke?
    • ncurses, on 11/17/2007, -0/+2:cripes:
  • weirdralph, on 11/14/2007, -14/+58Stupid kid. The real geniuses go to med school.
    • Torpov, on 11/14/2007, -0/+24Just look at how well Doogie Howser turned out.
      • rebrad, on 11/13/2007, -0/+3Practicing Proctologist at night. Bad actor by day.
      • Flashman, on 11/13/2007, -0/+6"Would you like to know more?"
        • dopplerdog, on 11/13/2007, -0/+4(* giant bug rips a cow into pieces *)
    • mattsx, on 11/13/2007, -3/+3uh yeah... he's AWESOME on How I Met Your Mother!
      • MacEnvy, on 11/13/2007, -0/+8I was thinking more along the lines of Harold and Kumar. Best celebrity cameo ever.
        • knetworx, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1And here's $200 for the car.
          Uh...I made some love stains in the back seat...
          ....you'll see.
    • KibibyteBrain, on 11/13/2007, -0/+3Yeah, as much as this is fake, I could believe a 10 year old easily taking on college if he majored in most of the crappy majors out there these days. "Going to College" doesn't matter these days and should never had, its all about what you study and do when you are there.
      • cyberoptic, on 11/13/2007, -1/+0Going to college doesn't matter if you're happy with a $10-$14 an hour job, a ***** house and no food. WTG have fun living in your moms basement, smoking weed and playing nintendo until you're 50
    • inertic, on 11/13/2007, -2/+13Someone obviously doesn't know about medicine and thinks all dr.'s drive ferraris. Most people going to med school have mountains of debt and almost no free time to do anything else. Once they graduate, it is residency for 3-7 years where you are somebody's bitch working over 80 hrs a week while the janitor makes more $/hr than you. Then you can finally start practicing. You will now have to pay off all your loans along with tens of thousands (if not more) in malpractice insurance. Also add the fact that medicine will now be your life, extremely stressful, and dr.'s have one of the highest divorce rates. This is why they tell people not to go into medicine unless you are genuinely interested.
      The real geniuses go get their MBA's at a top business school.
      • orca94, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1Or work on wall street out of college.
      • lime148, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2Good thing I'm going into pharm school instead.
      • toytoyota, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2You sound like a med school reject. Yeah they have ***** tons of loans but banks love to give loans to med students because they know they pay them back really fast. If the loans are scaring anyone wanting to become a doctor, don't worry about it. Residency isn't that long, only if you want to specialize in something like Dermatology. There is a ton of labor, but isn't anything worthwhile worth the effort. Nothing against MBA's, but that sounds like a harsh critique of medicine. Hopefully by the time you've decided to become one you've realized it's hard hours and lots of work. I just think it can be more rewarding than business sometimes.
        • covertbadger, on 11/14/2007, -1/+2I think that was his whole point - don't do it for the money, do it because you find it worthwhile and rewarding. If you aren't interested but want a fat wallet, medicine is not a good way to go.
    • Pinkertinkle, on 11/13/2007, -4/+4You're equally ignorant if you think that's the average doctor has to go through.
    • smpx, on 11/14/2007, -3/+4You're equally ignorant if you think that's [what] the average doctor has [had/must] to go through [to achieve success].

      *stifles laughter*
  • gymnoZphyter, on 11/13/2007, -19/+2Yeah that's really sad, but maybe that's just what we need in America. Eleven year old kids giving us financial advice
    • gobearsgo, on 11/14/2007, -0/+4haha sad, sad? Thats the funniest thing I have ever heard, the child races through a 25 year process in only 10 years, then comes to realize that hes now ***** himself and must work the rest of his life. I don't understand the rush that society has to complete an education, I would rather enjoy my time on earth considering I wont be here very long, wouldn't you?
      • gymnoZphyter, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1Word
      • covertbadger, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2I think that entirely depends on whether you find education enjoyable. It's pretty near the top of my list of things I choose to spend my free time doing.
  • vroom101, on 11/13/2007, -10/+8I have my doubts about the story:
    http://www.blackcollegebands.com/forums/newsroom/6 ...
  • melondrama, on 11/14/2007, -1/+157um, the story's obviously a fake.
    • wes00mertes, on 11/13/2007, -4/+5I think the majority of people who read this will realize it is a fake. There are a few who don't get it and post dumb comments, but it was pretty obvious that it was satirical.
      I loved it.
      • Mast3rDigg3r, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2wait, so the frats don't let 10 year olds hang out with them?
        • JeffD, on 11/13/2007, -0/+3Depends, how good is he at guitar hero?
          • knetworx, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2No dude! Let him in! Chicks totally dig 10-year-olds!
      • djpants428, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1We go through the same thing every time the onion makes the frontpage. Some people have a hard time detecting satire, even from well known sources of it.
      • ElSpaniard, on 11/13/2007, -2/+1.
    • joshuaer, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1well from what i have heard www.usedwigs.com and http://www.marchingsport.com/ are some good sources for news well those are the servers it hits before it ends up at blackcollegebands.com/

      LOL
    • sepelester, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1Right. This is like the World Championship in Stating the Obvious.
  • Johncampbell, on 11/14/2007, -9/+7Ugh. There is no way that is real! If this story is in fact true, I feel sorry for that little runt. He might set a new record, first kid to washout at 13.
    • ricree, on 11/13/2007, -2/+2"There is no way that is real! If this story is in fact true"

      Well.... Other than using your brain, anyways.
  • Aindrea, on 11/14/2007, -22/+2uh? hello? that means he attended highschool at age 2, at the most.
    • Erowid, on 11/13/2007, -1/+5I doubt it's real 'cuz of legal issues, but... People skip grades, or, there are some who are home schooled and write high school equivalency exams at an early age, then head off to university quite young... Youngest I've heard of (off the top of my head) starting university was like 12 years old. It's rare, but it happens.
      • cap11235, on 11/13/2007, -2/+2I started when I was 11. Granted, I did start at a city college, then transfered.
    • Bodhinature, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2Obviously, you weren't the top of your class...
  • jmoo1, on 11/14/2007, -1/+22That's a very witty piece, and cleverly written too.
    "...said Park as he unclips his necktie and downs chocolate milk at McSorley’s Pub in Manhattan where he and some of his colleagues meet for the occasional drink after work." GOLD!!
    • fickip, on 11/13/2007, -5/+1pubs dont just lets 11 year olds walk in...
      • antibastard, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1omg you're right...this article must be a FAKE!!11!!!1!1
  • dillibob, on 11/13/2007, -1/+6im sure this is fake, but lol "old biddies"
  • green1, on 11/14/2007, -4/+122How does boy wonder with an MBA @ 11 years old only start out making 58k?
    My 12 year old only has a bachelors and started at 90k on wallstreet... this kid is a loser.
    • Speaking, on 11/13/2007, -1/+12Because he is from New Jersey. That is all.
  • kylesherman, on 11/13/2007, -6/+3Where is the Snopes entry when we need it?
    • ricree, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2At Snopes of course. But what do we need a Snopes page for, anyways?
  • AriaStar, on 11/13/2007, -7/+73FAKE, People, FAKE.

    "“I never really thought about what I wanted to do after my schooling,” said a visibly tired Park as he unclips his necktie and downs chocolate milk at McSorley’s Pub in Manhattan where he and some of his colleagues meet for the occasional drink after work."

    Even a genius wouldn't be allowed into a pub at 10. I can't believe you're falling for this. It'd be illegal for him to work as well. Genius or not, he's still subject to the child labor laws.
    • Jondi10, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1Actually in most states you can get a work permit from the state gov't allowing you to work if your under the age limit. They are usually only given under special circumstances like if your parents aren't able to make enough money to support the family. I haven't read the article because the link isn't working for me but once I do I'll tell you what I think.
      • xtc46, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1heh you dont even need a reason here to get a permit, you can just say "I want to work" they do stipulate the hours you can work though (like you cant work after 9pm is you are under 16)
      • AriaStar, on 11/13/2007, -3/+2The age limit is 16, but you can get a permit from age 14. To my knowledge, no U.S. state allows kids under 14 to work at all. If the parents can't support the kids, they get welfare.
    • ElSpaniard, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1See what got me was the picture.
    • spancho, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1IN most states, as long as the pub/bar serves food, underage persons are allowed on the premises.
    • DharmaTurtle, on 11/14/2007, -0/+1Wow, way to be consistent Digg.

      He was buried for saying the same thing a bit up...
  • iamsamsamiam, on 11/13/2007, -2/+7If those quotes were 'actually' from the kid he's a true genius..
    He's 11 and he's as cynical as I am.
  • ephrils1, on 11/13/2007, -7/+2He should quit working until he's 18. Or 16 maybe.
  • Disease, on 11/14/2007, -0/+38If Digg users truly think this is real then I lost all hope for Digg.
    • Hayaemsay, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2I digg because it's satrical. Truth be told I lost hope in Digg before I signed up.
    • sepelester, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1...
  • stevenbn, on 11/14/2007, -0/+6Reads like it was written by the Onion. Obviously fake, but it's meant to be so, and it's funny.
    • DeviantDragon, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1Congratulations kind sir, you've discovered the meaning of satire!
  • vat0r, on 11/13/2007, -0/+6Dead or dying server!
  • Treshnell, on 11/13/2007, -2/+4Jimmy?
  • centran, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1Yeah ok it is fake but funny read/"quotes".
    However, It is not totally unheard of. My college had a 12 y/o going to it. All though like others said he wasn't really a genius because I think he was majoring in business.
    And i say he wasn't really a genius because of this fake article. A child, genuis or not, can not work 70 hour weeks. There might be some loop hole for a personal business though.
    That is why a lot of the genius kids go pre-med. By the time they are done with the school part they should be almost 18(at least over 16) so there is no problems with child labor laws.
    • xtc46, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1and becasue growing up most people tell their kids ot be doctors, not "financial consultants"
  • LordSeth, on 11/13/2007, -3/+1Oh god how can one try and report about a boy genius and yet have so many grammatical errors in the article that its not funny
    • FirstDivision, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2Let me guess...they left out apostrophes and question marks?
  • uziko, on 11/13/2007, -4/+4What kind of loser would actually spend time writing a dumb story like that. That was just dumb.
    • flarizle, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1The same kind of loser that would make a comment like yours.
  • tofus, on 11/13/2007, -3/+1they make chapstick in madison, nj.
  • Laughto, on 11/13/2007, -2/+6To quote Ricky Gervais, and my message to the internet, "stop making ***** up all your life"
  • Hoxie, on 11/13/2007, -1/+7You're believing news from a site called "used wigs".
    I have lost faith in you, digg.

  • rayefrenzy, on 11/13/2007, -0/+4Not only is it fake, but the site is also down. Let this die.
  • databoy, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2Dead at 127 diggs.

    Obviously the story is a fake. The fish took the bait, hook, line and sinker.
    • passedoutghost, on 11/13/2007, -0/+0If it's dead, how do you know it's a fake?
  • hamalicious, on 11/13/2007, -2/+6More proof that DIGG is being ruined by the combination of friends and shouts....
    • xtc46, on 11/13/2007, -1/+3or more proof that people like funny things.
      • Saiing, on 11/13/2007, -0/+2Nope, more proof that a large number of digg readers are morons.
  • shagg187, on 11/13/2007, -2/+6Buried. Please don't degrade the quality of Digg, guys. Die, fake news, die. This story is as old and fake as the "Canadian Lighthouse" story.
  • Syphon8, on 11/13/2007, -2/+2Clearly fake.

    The youngest university ENTRANCE ever was 11, and the article is just a joke in itself. :p
  • kidwithsword, on 11/13/2007, -8/+2There are actually some reasons that suggest this is fake. Here are two:

    1. The kid is working at 11. Where I live, every place I know requires you, by law, to be 14 to work.
    2. The statements are very stereotypical of "little kids." For example: "I am saving up to buy a super cool tree fort." What? He works and he wants to use his money to buy a tree fort?

    It is very obviously fake.

    Now, I have to go write my Algebra report. Gahhh....
  • dodomingo, on 11/13/2007, -1/+5"So here I am, a working stiff paying busting my ass in low-level financial advisory hell, counseling old biddies about whether to buy 10 shares of this mutual fund or that, one all in a futile attempt to make partner by 15.”

    Haha, love it.
  • mrogi, on 11/13/2007, -0/+0That kid is an imbecile. A real genius works in Las Vegas as a casino executive.
  • vsujohn2, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1Thats New Jersey for you.....
  • Super6, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1I don't think anyone could believe this. Seriously, do you think that a kid could go through 12 years of education by age 6? Most kids can't put legitimate sentences together until 3, which means he had to learn at 4 times the normal rate.
  • saltshaker2323, on 11/13/2007, -2/+33Mozart wrote his first concerto at age five. Tiger Woods learned to play golf at three. And now Madison, New Jersey’s own child prodigy Jason Park is stuck in a crappy job at age 11.

    Under the home-school guidance of his mother, Park finished high school at the age of six. He then breezed through college by the time he was eight and capped off his accelerated education by receiving his MBA from Villanova University at the tender age of 10. Now the precocious young man is a first-year consultant with a financial consulting firm making 58K a year, working 70-hour weeks and hating every minute of it.

    “I never really thought about what I wanted to do after my schooling,” said a visibly tired Park as he unclips his necktie and downs chocolate milk at McSorley’s Pub in Manhattan where he and some of his colleagues meet for the occasional drink after work.

    “I was always good at math, so my parents told me to study finance like John Kenneth Galbraith. Great! So here I am, a working stiff paying busting my ass in low-level financial advisory hell, counseling old biddies about whether to buy 10 shares of this mutual fund or that, one all in a futile attempt to make partner by 15.”

    With his education complete and a ton of student loans hanging over his head, Park had no choice but to enter the workforce. “I kind of wanted to kick around for a while, you know, have some ‘me’ time… maybe backpack through Euro Disney for a few weeks.”

    That didn’t pan out. Park was recruited right out of school. “I thought he was a midget when we first met, which actually helped him,” said company recruiter Sheldon Goldfarb. “We provide equal opportunity for the differently sized here. I realized I was wrong about Park after he interrupted my interview questions repeatedly to show me his Yu-Gi-Oh! trading cards.”

    Park said his parents were “banking on People Magazine or one of those stupid 20/20 shows to pick up my story when I was in high school so I could get some scholarship offers. They wrote letters and sent in videos of me playing my mini violin and building robots, but no one was biting. It seems there’s a bunch of genius kids like me whipping through cut-rate colleges.”

    The young consultant perked up for moment as he fondly recalled his college days. “I really miss Nova. We just kicked it at the frat house all day. We played video games 24/7 and jammed to Dave Matthews. It was totally chill! I could actually palm the basketball in the frat house Pop-a-Shot games.”

    But his voice quickly returned to its joyless monotone as he thought to the future, “Now, I got sixty years of crunching numbers and drinking bad coffee at client sites to look forward to. Whoopde-frickin-do. Look at these bags under my eyes… Christ almighty.”

    Park lives at home with his parents in Madison for the time being. “I’m saving up to build a super cool tree fort.”

    When Park does have time to hang out with friends in his neighborhood, he is usually teased about being different (he only wears sensible golf clothes and loafers) and his recent weight gain. “Yeah, guess I got a bit of a gut now, but hey, I work so much I just don’t have time to hit the swings like I used to.”
    • knetworx, on 11/13/2007, -0/+3Now, if they just got this kid to work on their servers, we'd all be set.
      P.S. - I think the best thing about this article is that almost every single sentence contains a blatant satirical remark, and yet for some reason, most of the people here didn't get it. That's one point for the author, zero points for humanity.
    • erbylikewhoa, on 11/13/2007, -1/+0yeah wow, after reading it, it's quite clearly fake

      and google comes up with no results except digg ...
  • Jeveran, on 11/14/2007, -0/+7Look up "satire" in the dictionary. This story is probably linked as an example.
  • vagarach, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1Even if it is true, why not just do stuff on the side while going through the 12 year school system. In that time your mental faculties would have become far better than what they were at 11, college level or not.
  • kanimara, on 11/13/2007, -1/+11Urg.. I thought Digg has at least a slightly intelligent userbase? They may be intelligent, but that doesn't seem to stop them from being super freaking guillible. "There's no way this is true! But if it is, XXXX"...... just terrible. Who wants to buy a bridge?

    I mean the kid is drinking chocolate milk in a bar and saving up to buy a treehouse. COME ON.
  • digudown, on 11/13/2007, -1/+3http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tathagat_Avatar_Tulsi
    above kid is real as he was in same school as me. He finished his masters at 13 which I think is a world record. Though he is an Indian still he is not in crappy job but pursuing a PhD. So this story is obviously fake. Dugged for being funny :)
    • IanthePez, on 11/13/2007, -1/+5For a genius, he sure has a horrible website! Guess he was bored in that class as well.
      • digudown, on 11/15/2007, -0/+1I agree .. I guess his design sense it on 10 yr old :D
    • mille716, on 11/13/2007, -0/+4The aforementioned terrible site.
      http://www.physics.iisc.ernet.in/~tathagat/
    • thedaylights, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2The past tense of digg is dugg. The past tense of dugg is ... there is no ***** past tense of dugg! It's already past tense.

      Thanks for the link though! ;)
      • digudown, on 11/15/2007, -0/+1Of all the things about the comment you noticed one misspelling, is physics stuff too much for your intellect?
    • knetworx, on 11/13/2007, -1/+2It's an elitist prick in training. He'll be so full of himself, until one day he'll be old, alone, and teaching undergrad physics. That's when it'll hit him....
    • TerrorByteX, on 11/13/2007, -2/+1"Though he is an Indian still he is not in crappy job but pursuing a PhD."
      ...
      Racist much?
      • digudown, on 11/15/2007, -0/+1No just to show how unrealistic above article about 'boy genius having a crappy job' is.
    • Neb28, on 11/13/2007, -0/+0http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kim_Ung-Yong
    • orlyfactor, on 11/13/2007, -1/+1I wonder if he stinks.
  • jimmiss, on 11/14/2007, -1/+4It's satire you morons.
  • skase, on 11/13/2007, -2/+1That title so reminded me of my days at fark.com
  • Stevethegreat, on 11/13/2007, -3/+1I bet nobody'll heard from him in 10 years times (I mean besides his family).
  • Jerky1312, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1This article was written with the support of many a twenty-something year olds, still living at home arguing its not worth finishing college. Unfortunately, the article isn't real, its satire.
  • OathOfFealty, on 11/13/2007, -5/+4Internal Server Error

    The server encountered an internal error or misconfiguration and was unable to complete your request.

    Please contact the server administrator, webmaster@usedwigs.com and inform them of the time the error occurred, and anything you might have done that may have caused the error.

    More information about this error may be available in the server error log.

    Additionally, a 500 Internal Server Error error was encountered while trying to use an ErrorDocument to handle the request.
  • joshzweig, on 11/13/2007, -6/+1Why does he have student loans?

    How the hell didn't he get a free ride?
  • ZenMojo, on 11/13/2007, -1/+5I remember when my mom asked me if I wanted to graduate high school a few years early. My response: "I'd be a virgin forever."
  • lostradamus, on 11/13/2007, -0/+4Wow Digg users have gotten really dumb lately.
  • thedigger1010, on 11/13/2007, -2/+2Fake or not this is funny *****..... LOL
  • manbergur, on 11/13/2007, -0/+1come on giving a ***** break hahahah. made me laugh at least
  • bluechips23, on 11/13/2007, -0/+14Mirror or it didn't happen.
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