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CAN'T PEE IN IT, CAN'T FIGHT IN IT


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If you're going into battle, you've got two wardrobe options: You can dress in something practical -- camouflage, body armor, boring shit like that -- or you can slap on a SpongeBob costume, paint your flamethrower bright pink, and hope the enemy is too confused and/or terrified to remember which end of their weapon is "kill."

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SURF'S UP


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Remember the last time you taught a pet to do a simple trick like sit or roll over? Hours of coaxing, promises of treats, all to get an animal to do something that's ultimately pointless? Well, we're about to severely squash your sense of accomplishment, because apparently you could've spent that time doing something far more impressive, but still completely pointless.

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