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9 Islamic Fatwas We Can Get Behind
cracked.com — Amidst all that zany murderousness, radical Islam sometimes issues a fatwa that startles us with its clarity and insight. Here are some real, actual fatwas that we're ready to get on board with.
MrBabyMan- 174 diggs
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- wisam, on 02/24/2008, -2/+15I know the article sarcastic and shouldn't be taken seriously, but I have to say that a Fatwa is not an edict. Its merely an opinion of a qualified cleric on a religious matter. A Fatwa is not obligating in anyway. Two clerics can give opposing Fatwas on a certain issue and a Muslim is to follow whoever he/she wants.
- GlennLThompson, on 02/24/2008, -4/+3I agree. Let the titty sucking commence.
- wisam, on 02/25/2008, -2/+3Before the grammar Nazis freak out, it's "it's" and not "its"
- anidal, on 02/25/2008, -1/+4Just to point out some thing else, not all of these are fatwas. Some are islamic rules:
* Men are not allowed to publicly display the region between the navel and the knee.
* Men are not allowed to wear silk
* You cant kill animals for fun. Only for eating.
Also a point about the breastfeeding fatwa, the cleric who came up with this was almost fired from Al-Azhar Islamic school for saying this. It's since been revoked. But the story and reasoning behind this is interesting:
In ancient Arab times, city Arabs would often send their children to be brought up by a step-mother so they could become accustomed to desert living. All children brought up by the same step-mother would be considered siblings. The cleric reasoned that doing the same at the workplace would have similar acceptance - DesertDude, on 02/25/2008, -0/+1Mostly correct, but the Muslim's obligation is to choose the one he/she thinks is closer to the truth, whether they want it or not.
- darkcss, on 02/24/2008, -13/+2MrBabyMan sucks my ass.
- satanikus, on 02/24/2008, -3/+7I thought he sucked my ass. Damn two-timer.
- darkcss, on 02/24/2008, -2/+8hahaha, we should get him on Cheaters.
- satanikus, on 02/24/2008, -3/+7I thought he sucked my ass. Damn two-timer.
- ronpaulblogscom, on 02/24/2008, -1/+3I always thought catch and release fishing was lame as hell. I only ever did it was when I was at my limit for the day and maybe just a couple times. Most people that do it are too stupid to know you are not supposed to touch the sides of fish too much. If you grab a fish it hurts it. Taking it out of the water hurts it. As does having it get jabbed in the mouth by a hook, dragged into a boat for a picture then thrown back in the water bleeding possibly with hooks in it. Catch and release mortality rates for fish are about 40%, you might as well eat the fish.
- EatingPie, on 02/25/2008, -1/+2I've heard that fish have no nerves in their mouths and don't feel the hook. That's pure hearsay, so take it as such.
OTOH, much catch/release fishing is actually done in with deep sea game fishing. Marlin, for example, produces very little edible meat. It used to be that the "break" was often cut off as a trophy and the rest of the fish ditched into the water. Now they are caught, photographed and released. Obviously this is the far better alternative.
-Pie
- EatingPie, on 02/25/2008, -1/+2I've heard that fish have no nerves in their mouths and don't feel the hook. That's pure hearsay, so take it as such.
- Pitofdoom, on 02/24/2008, -1/+3But I like silk....
- dunnylovehun, on 02/24/2008, -1/+3Well at least #1 would do away with the Good Ol' Boy system...
- ramo13, on 02/24/2008, -2/+3No 9,8 & 1 are bogus,
otherwise really funny...- GlennLThompson, on 02/24/2008, -0/+3Actually, they are all real fatwa, though number 1 is probably the most blatant example of a fatwa that no Muslim would actually follow.
- xTRUMANx, on 02/25/2008, -0/+1The link to number one points to jerusalem post which say the AP said it but no sourcing...
- GlennLThompson, on 02/24/2008, -0/+3Actually, they are all real fatwa, though number 1 is probably the most blatant example of a fatwa that no Muslim would actually follow.
- saxreturns, on 02/25/2008, -2/+1Dugg for excellent use of 'that's what she said'.
- Maksx, on 02/25/2008, -1/+2As a well read muslim i can say that some of those are taken out of context and in exaggeration. despite that fact also, these are the sayings of various clerics and vary from person to person, however we can agree as all muslims that there are some things that are right and wrong. As long as we generally agree in one book, one God, and the fact that Muhammaed (pbuh) was the last prophet you're a muslim and anything else is upto debate. (well almost anything)
- betheturtle, on 08/14/2008, -0/+11. Be Born Poor 2. Accompany Uncle on Trading Voyages 3. Meet and Marry a Widow 4. Meditate Alone in Cave 5. ??? 6. PROPHET!!!
- betheturtle, on 08/14/2008, -0/+11. Be Born Poor 2. Accompany Uncle on Trading Voyages 3. Meet and Marry a Widow 4. Meditate Alone in Cave 5. ??? 6. PROPHET!!!
- JLecker, on 02/25/2008, -1/+2I, for one, whole-heartedly support fatwa #2.
- msaleem, on 02/25/2008, -1/+3With Fatwas like these, who needs the war on terror?
- uzair21, on 02/25/2008, -0/+2You definitely don't need it because you are from.....You know where.
- wisam, on 02/25/2008, -0/+2Your name is Muhammad, isn't it?
- realjames, on 02/25/2008, -4/+1Buried...anyone who thinks soccer is a pansy sport, really needs to see Eduardo's ankle get obliterated this weekend: http://youtube.com/watch?v=RpHufZEaFe0&
- GlennLThompson, on 02/25/2008, -0/+3It is a comedy article. Why would proponents of the world's most popular sport be so self-conscious?
- saxreturns, on 02/25/2008, -0/+1Soccer? Oh, you mean football. If you're going to take things so seriously at least get the name of the sport right!
- KevinFederline, on 02/25/2008, -0/+3Football (you call it Socccer) is the most popular Sport in the world. It certainly has it's appeal. Now, Baseball, THAT is boring.
- GlennLThompson, on 02/25/2008, -0/+2It certainly is a fun game to play. It is also very inexpensive to play, at the most basic level. I'm sure that has nothing to do with it.
- DesertDude, on 02/25/2008, -0/+1Football is non-stop running for an hour and a half. That's too much for Americans. They'd rather stand at a base and chew tobacco until the ninth inning.
- uzair21, on 02/25/2008, -1/+1Make fuss of everything Islam.......Thats your main motive. Ain't it. Go, drink milk( Pun intended).
- Goodbyeworld, on 02/25/2008, -1/+2Seriously, if the submitter had half a brain then he (or she, i guess) would know that the phrase "murderous Islam" is an oxymoron. It has been stated many times over that the people who are suicide bombers are the farthest people from Muslim ideals possible.
And seriously, has a cracked list ever NOT been on digg?- SmooveO, on 02/25/2008, -0/+2Are you seriously being that big of a baby? Seriously? SERIOUSLY?
- neocognitism, on 02/25/2008, -3/+3I think this submission is racist and offensive for obvious reasons. buried.
- GlennLThompson, on 02/25/2008, -0/+2If everyone is taking the article so seriously, where are the objections to losing your freedom of speech? It is all fairly tongue in cheek people.
- pervezalammzn, on 03/06/2008, -0/+0Fatwa for those who do something wrong for Islamic Community.
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