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ivy leaguers strike again

The Age Gap Essay Making Eyes Roll, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'

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The Age Gap Essay Making Eyes Roll, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
A guy's fiancée is not rocking with him, at all.
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Every day, somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on X from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.



This week, we've got a degenerate take by a presidential nominee parody, a guy who loves his chairs more than his family and a writer who was thrown to the wolves (maybe by design) by The Cut.


Monday

@sexyRFK

The character: @sexyRFK, X user, breast ponderer

The plot: Breasts: A body part for the ages. Many people have them, and even more people have opinions about them. A bizarre "Sexy RFK" X account with dueling Biden/MAGA hats placed on classic pictures of Robert F. Kennedy (the OG, not his anti-vax spawn running for President) has posed a question to "MEN" about their breast size preferences. The core of the question is a snore, but the way the question was asked really made eyes roll from Melbourne to Boston.



The repercussion: Nobody cares what "MEN" have to say about breasts in general, but the specifics here make this post like catnip to the chronically online. Troll accounts are presumably created to evoke these kinds of responses, so it seems "Sexy RFK" is getting just what they want. Hooray?



Grant Brunner



Saturday

Grantavius

The character: @nicholasig13, inconsiderate fiancé, rocking chair enthusiast

The plot: On the weekend, X user @nicholasig13 took to the app to air a grievance with his pregnant fiancée: she doesn't want to put the rocking chair his mother nursed him and his sister in in their new baby's nursery.

The OP's annoyance might seem understandable at first, but it quickly becomes clear that he's not looking for compromise. After one user tells him to ignore her wishes and simply do as he pleases, he replies, "that was my plan."


The repercussion: Sharing a private argument between yourself and your partner online is bad enough — but his lack of regard for the feelings and wants of the person carrying his child is astounding. She's the one who's going to be spending time in that room nursing the baby, so it seems fair that she gets to pick what kind of chair she does that in, no?

Also, can't the chair just go in another room in the house? Couldn't OP's sister — who also has a connection to the chair, and could perhaps even use it for nursing her own child — have it? There are plenty ways around this dispute, but disrespecting your partner and the mother of your child isn't one of them.


Darcy Jimenez


Wednesday

Grazie Sophia Christie

The character: Grazie Sophia Christie, age gap relationship expert, writer of "The Case for Marrying an Older Man"

The plot: Hey, did you know that you can date older men, and that sometimes it's the antidote to a woman's suffering? That's the thesis behind Sophia Christie's Cut article, "The Case for Marrying an Older Man." All of its nearly 3,700 words are devoted to the author and her special, wait for it, 10-year age gap relationship.



The repercussion: The premise behind this article is preposterous once you keep finding out more details behind this woman's life. It's just a patently absurd thing to publish, and no one takes this seriously at all. The guy is 30? Not even old! This has to be parody, right?



Jared Russo


Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, featuring a movie director's unpopular take on politics, a musician taking on streaming services with another app, some truly abysmal AI-generated music and a guy who thinks habitual DoorDash users should be ashamed of themselves.

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